


Friendly Feelings

by Waitingontatennant



Category: Doctor Who RPF
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-11-27
Updated: 2013-11-27
Packaged: 2018-01-02 19:30:11
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 1,833
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1060694
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Waitingontatennant/pseuds/Waitingontatennant
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>After meal discussions get a little too serious</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Friendly Feelings

“Do you think it ever really matters?”

“Mmm?”

The seriousness in her voice caught his attention before she even had time to finish the question.

“I  _was_  going to say” Catherine let out a sigh of slight annoyance that sent David even more on edge. “Do you think that it really matters if you don’t… how can I put this, if the intensity of feelings a person has in a relationship is never quite, reciprocated”

To go from crying laughing over a shared joke to now brewing over some kind of philosophical, moral-questioning thought, in the space of five minutes was bizarre  _even_  for Catherine.

“Catherine, what is this?” His expression was overwhelmed with confusion and panic, she could see that he was searching for any possible hidden meanings in her question, and this seemed to cause as much alarm within Catherine as her question had done with David.

A moment of silence passed. They were now simply sat alone in his parked car solely focused on each other’s eyes; outside of the restaurant they had shared dinner together not 10 minutes ago.

The realisation of their isolation was enough to pull David out of his bemusement. He was the first to speak.

“Look if you and Twig have had some kind of argument, then I…”

With a roll of her eyes Catherine was to awakened “Oh David, it was a purely innocent question, no hidden agenda, promise” That was a lie.

“Well then, yeah. Of course it matters. The whole point in a relationship is that the two people involved love each other right? I mean they may always be one who loves the other slightly more or whatever but there needs to be an almost equal balance for it to last surely? Oh I don’t know Catherine, its late do we really need to talk about stuff like this now?”

“No but see this is my point. If you’re fortunate enough to find someone who whole heartedly loves you, I mean the whole lot, even your disgusting traits you have that make you cringe”

David immediately began to smirk at this, but his face fell back to his solemn expression.

“Then is it really important that you don’t feel the same type of love for them? Not that takes-your-breathe-away, cant-believe-I’m-so-lucky type of love just the extended admiration type? Shouldn’t you just appreciate what you have and not go searching for anything…more?”

When Catherine finally turned to meet David’s eyes he turned and spoke almost immediately, ensuring the she didn’t recognise the pain in his them.

“But, but doesn’t the said person have a right to feel that type of love for someone as well?

“Yeah but in doing so, in trying to pursue something that you aren’t even sure will work, or even result in love like that. Then… then aren’t you just denying the other _said_  person the opportunity of being happy? Do you see what I mean, you can’t win”

“But would they be happy? Would you?”

“What?”

“You love to feel love back Catherine, it’s not fair on either party if that isn’t the case”

“Is it ever fair?”

With slight hesitation David responds “No”

And there they are again, isolated silence.

Despite what Catherine said David was now sure that this was her way of telling him to back off. He doesn’t really understand how she knows. Is he really that transparent? He spends half their time together mapping out his movements, to avoid arousing any suspicions of what exactly David’s feelings are for Catherine, especially the suspicions of Catherine herself. Or more importantly his  _wife_.

And for Catherine he has achieved this. This was her way of asking David’s advice on what  _she_ should do. Risk it all for a man she loves, who may end up being horrified in finding out his mate has more than  _friendly_  feelings and thoughts towards him.

Or spend the next however many years with a man who  _adores_  her, but a man that pales into insignificance compared to David. David was her best friend-the person she told everything to, and it was killing her that she couldn’t share this with him. Not until she knew if it was the right thing to do.


	2. Cautious Catherine no more

Unbeknownst to Catherine, she had just successfully convinced the object of her feelings to never act upon his.  _For now_.

David began to feel intense discomfort about where the night had lead, he considered driving Catherine straight home, like the best friend he is. But he didn’t want to leave things like that. There was an awkwardness in the air. He’d never felt awkward around Catherine before, it wasn’t natural for them.

“So, are you ready to be taken home Miss. Tate? Or do you fancy the pub? Strictly soft drink based activities of course, or…”

“The pub. The pub sounds great” She couldn’t bear to find out what his next suggestion would be, being around more people other than David felt like a good idea right now. She smiled a faux smile at him and in return he gave her his biggest grin- genuinely pleased that’s she’s not running from him.

The journey to the pub was relatively quiet, their conversation never branched out further than the recent Christmas decorations that had been placed alongside the road.

“You go find us a seat I’ll get them in” David gestured towards a booth at the back of the crowded pub.

Nothing sounded worse than being left alone with her thoughts “Naa, you’re okay- first ones on me” her fake smile made a re-appearance.

David’s eyes never left Catherine whilst she stood at the bar, analysing every movement she made. She was painfully aware of this, and he made no attempts to hide it just simply smiling at her whenever she looked over. He’d always been very conscious of his gaze, never staring to long. Tonight though, just them two he felt like he didn’t have to worry.

“Here you are then” Her voice was at a level higher than usual and it didn’t go without David noticing. He also noticed that she had bought him a beer, which he began to feel very cautious of, especially with the thoughts of their earlier discussion running in head. Lax inhibitions was the last thing he needed around Catherine.

“No cranberry juice tonight then?” David mused over the brown liquid in Catherine’s glass whilst taking a drink of his beer. Coke he presumed.

“No, fancied a vodka and coke” looking up slightly at him under her brow as she drank from her straw.

“Vod-vodka? Catherine? Vodka? Seriously what is going on with you to night?” He let out a laugh, one of shock more than anything.

“Ohh who are  _you_ my mum? I fancied a drink”

“You don’t just  _fancy_  a drink Catherine, I mean for Christ sake when was the last time you drank? And you choose vodka of all things to start off with”

“Well, I can’t taste it, I don’t see what the fuss is about”

Before Catherine has a chance to take another drink David had already plucked the straw from her drink, shot it on the floor and placed his hand over the glass “enough”.

“David, you can’t-“

“We need to talk Catherine, and I’d prefer it if you were coherent throughout that”

Catherine takes David’s wrist, removes it from her glass and it one foul swoop downs her drink “I lied, it was double vodka and coke”. 


	3. Chapter 3

 

They hadn’t lasted more than a half an hour in the pub before David felt it was an appropriate time to drive a slightly worse for wear Catherine home, having abandoned his beer almost as soon as it was placed in front of him.

He had now begun to worry that the sheer thought of him having feelings towards Catherine had drove her to drink “Catherine I’m sorry”.

He didn’t bother turning to meet her gaze, she was already slumped back on the chair eyes firmly shut. Rather his eyes stayed forward, elbow pressed against his car window. Focused on the emptiness that surrounded them.

“I’m sorry for messing it up, messing us up. God if I’ve fucked our friendship up I’d never forgive myself. I don’t know how you knew. I never know how you know half the things you do about me, remember” David brakes from his speech in favour for a barely audible laughter “ah, remember that time you brought me that horrible tea/soup stuff when I was ill, the one that tasted like feet. I drank it all, mainly to make you happy and, and it helped. I mean it still tasted like feet but it helped. You have a knack for knowing what’s best for me far more than I ever do. I know your right about us Catherine, I just don’t want to admit it. Not yet. Not now”.

“David?”

“Jes-Catherine your awake, nearly home don’t worry”

“Wanna know why I decided to drink tonight?”

“Oh Catherine don’t please, let’s just forget about it”

“I needed Dutch courage” Catherine burst out laughing, only stopping to whisper “I was going to tell you a secret”

David was beyond confused, never had a woman both infuriated him and intrigued him as much as Catherine did.

“I was going to tell you that I had _feelings_ for you” She erupted with laughter again.

David couldn’t see how this was funny, he was desperately staring at Catherine trying to decide whether or not this was the alcohol speaking. Only braking her gaze to focus back on driving. It _probably_ was the alcohol speaking, but for now he could cling onto hope “Catherine think about what you’re saying”

“No, no but you see David its fine. I’ve decided I’m not going to tell you, it’s just going to be our secret. I mean you’re my friend right? My best friend, so why would I want to scare you away by telling you something like that? Nah, I have you as a friend, I have you in my life. That’s better than nothing. ”

“Right” David didn’t know what else to say, he just felt as if he must say something _anything_.

What Catherine had just said didn’t seem to register to her. She simply feel back to sleep. Only waking when David was forced to almost carry her into her house.

That night he went home to his wife, watched TV with his wife, slept next to his wife. All the time his thoughts being solely directed towards Catherine. Knowing that she had feelings for him too made his whole situation, well worse. Now he knew his desire was realistic didn’t make it anymore attainable. Before he could cling onto the idea that Catherine would think it was ludicrous, ramble on about how it was purely proximity. He no longer had anything to cling onto, he no longer had anything.

Apart from Catherine. He always had her.

And she would always, _always_ have him.


End file.
